So You Call Yourself An Environmentalist

Yes I do in fact. I consider myself an environmentalist. The fact that I wash my hands a lot does not discount that I love the environment and work to protect it. Washing compulsively does not negate the fact that I recycle, or compost, or buy products that are less processed. I am part of my university's environmental club, where people talk constantly about wasting water (taking shorter showers, buying new toilets that use less water, etc), and I constantly feel like a hypocrite because I cannot prevent myself from over-washing. People think it's mind over matter. But it really can't be boiled down that far, especially because my mind is the problem. People say to me "if you just put your mind to it, you won't have to perform your rituals." If only, if only.

I struggle a lot with trying to explain myself to people. Or to ignore the sometimes odd looks I receive. How do you explain something that seems irrational to even me?